On the last page of every issue of Oprah’s magazine is her regular column, “What I know for sure.” Since I don’t subscribe, I usually catch the column in airport gift shops as I’m trying to kill time before my flight departs. The one-page commentary on what Oprah knows to be true usually proves to be much more entertaining than hanging out at the gate watching the status board as your flight gets delayed for the umpteenth time.
Since discovering I was pregnant late last summer, I’ve come to know a few things for sure about pregnancy, and since I’m such a fan of Oprah’s column by this name, I thought I’d write one of my own.
What I know for sure about pregnancy (so far)…
- Morning sickness may never strike in the morning (6:30 p.m. on the dot for me).
- You may experience an insatiable thirst that only Minute Made® pink lemonade or Crystal Light® raspberry lemonade can quench.
- You may feel the need to head for the ladies room only seconds after you’ve returned from that very place.
- You will be told that you’re “getting big,” “huge,” or “showing a lot.” The bearer of such tidings either is either male, childless or your “adorable” four-year-old niece.
- You will make a minor error at home or on the job that normally wouldn’t be worth mentioning, but now will be attributed by others as “pregnancy brain.”
- You will hear how others don’t like the name you’ve picked for your unborn child because they know someone by that name who’s either a) a stripper b) dead or c) their middle school nemesis. (Note to self: next time around, keep proposed names quiet until after delivery. People won’t comment nearly as much on a name already printed on the birth certificate.)
- There will come a point in your pregnancy when you laugh or cough and–yep–a little bit of pee comes out.
Moms and moms-to-be of the world, what do you know for sure?